Marry Me

Many people often say children don’t know what love is. However, that’s simply not true. If anything, children come into the world showing adults how to love with an open mind and heart. This past week, I saw photo of a man holding a baby in his arms. He looked so beautiful looking down smiling as he held that baby girl. Seeing him with the child reminded me of how safe I, myself felt around him. In fact, he was the only male, other than my grandpa, Clark I truly felt safe around (though our interactions were not many). He and I used to go to the same Kingdom Hall of Jehovah’s Witnesses in, New Carlisle, Ohio. At an early age I thought he was the most beautiful boy I had laid eyes on, so much so I felt him to be my, “Prince Eric” from Disney’s, The Little Mermaid. I even asked him in a note to “marry me”. To this day, I have so much love for him in my heart and soul, that seeing that photo of him has brought a tinge of sadness to my heart. However, the smile on his face is proof my prayer for his happiness is being answered. And at this point in life, that’s all that matters, and my experience is proof that children can and do know what love is.

Thanks for listening. And to my “Prince Eric”, may you always be happy and blessed.

Love Always,

Inanna Roxanna Arnett

©️4-7-18

**Photograph is not mine. I own nothing other than the words I have written today.**

What is this existence?

I’m downloading the thought that there’s no such thing as ascension. If there was, the universe would not feed off of itself. There’s no such thing as balance either. If there was, chaos would not exist. And chaos is in the universe and on earth. This is just my download. There are many downloads though to be had and discussed. No download is absolute, and I don’t claim such absoluteness with mine. Maybe my thoughts make no sense at all. However, as I live my days in this matrix or dimension, I’m seeing this to be a reality. None of us truly understand this existence. We just make due with what we can. I know I don’t understand this existence. What is this existence we live? I think about this often. There are moments of pure joy. And there are moments of pure pain. We definitely live in a dimension of dualities. “We are animals that refuse to see our disgusting sides.” (Heard this from someone else). Just as there is creation, there is destruction, and destruction is something we refuse to see. Creation is often labeled beautiful. Destruction not so much. After all, Christ allowed himself to be destroyed, so that humanity might live (that’s if he existed, I neither acknowledge or deny his existence). However, both life and death are needed, and both can be beautiful I suppose. There is birth and there is death, this is just the plain reality. The beauty is that we can experience both sides of the coin consciously. Therefore, enjoy life as much as you can. Have as much fun as you can, because that is the only thing I see worth having. A life full of fun, happiness, and enjoyment. And remember there are no mistakes. Just experiences we’ll carry on in our next lives. Love Always, Little Eagle (aka, me Roxanna). 🦅

©️ March 25, 2018 11:01 AM

Leaving the Nest

I left the nest and moved to Arizona when I was 24. At the time, I was still a Jehovah’s Witness, and had never been to Arizona. However, I always knew I wanted something different then the dysfunction I was raised in. So, in March of 2010, I took a leap and hopped on a plain with another fellow Jehovah’s Witness named Jannie. I didn’t tell a soul in my family when I made the choice to come here, as I knew I would have been talked out of it. Getting on that plane was the best decision I ever made. Second best decision getting some college under my belt. And the third, leaving the cult and organization of Jehovah’s Witnesses, and moving to Tempe, Arizona. I am safe, happy, content, and very well taken care of by the Universe. For that, I am deeply thankful and grateful for all that I have in my life. I don’t know what the future holds for me, but I’ve been told I’ll go far in my life by so many. Therefore, I think my tomorrows will be just as bright as today was. Have a beautiful day and thank you for taking time out of your busy day, and reading what I have to say on my life and experiences. I hope to keep on writing, as I truly love it so very much.

Love Always, Inanna Roxanna Arnett

© February 23, 2018

Feeling Scared

The child inside of me is feeling scared, and I love that. My roommate Ella, recently said she’s moving out in May with her husband. She and her husband were gone for two days this past weekend, and I loved it SO much. With that said, I’m so happy for her, and I wish her all the best in life with her husband. Although I’m very much looking forward to them moving out, I’m also nervous as fuck to be on my own. The first time I moved out on my own was back in 2007-2008, and I fell FLAT ON MY FACE. One of my biggest fears is being homeless. I think this has to do with my dad being homeless. However, I don’t want to fall flat on my face again, so I stick with roommates. People come into our lives to help us in one way or another, and I for one, believe Ella was sent to help guide me to a new start in life and in trusting. Trusting humans, trusting myself, and helping me to see that not all humans are abusive. Ella, along with my boyfriend are the first two humans I have met that are not abusive. Before moving into the apartment I’m currently living in, I was living with an intolerable and most insufferable woman whom I will call, Mama Crumpets, and Ella was living with a horrible roommate as well. Mama Crumpets was very narcissistic, very controlling, and because I didn’t value myself, I let that woman take almost every penny I had earned. People who come from abusive upbringings have a very hard time getting out of toxic situations and I was definitely in a toxic environment. Ella’s previous roommate Lauryn, was very racist and unkind as well. Not to mention, I grew up in a very dysfunctional family and I was raised in a cult. Cults indoctrinate so much fear into the minds of their flock that I was completely terrified to leave my current situation, because I was afraid of displeasing “God”. Had I not met Ella when I did, I probably would have taken my own life sooner or later. So trusting humans has and still is a rough area for me. However, in May of 2017, I took a leap of faith and moved in with Ella. I am so thankful and grateful she came into my life. She has shown me a difference between normal and abnormal behavior, that I have never seen before meeting her. I truly love her exponentially. She is always saying, “Roxanna saved me”. However, I feel we saved each other, because she was also just as scared as I was in having roommates. It was a good thing to take a chance and trust each other, because she has added to my growth as an individual. It’s been a very long time since I’ve been “on my own”, and I’m hoping to not fall flat on my face. However, I’m also tired of moving, so I’m going to stay in this two bedroom apartment by myself and hopefully with no more roommates, because it really is time for me to be by myself, and I am so very excited about this. With that said, wish me well and have a very good night.

Love Always,

Inanna Roxanna Arnett

©️ February 19, 2018

Greatest of Companionship’s

Never have I felt

more secure, as I do

when in your company.

To your hiding place.

Carry me away, Lord Shiva.

Off into the sunset let us ride.

I don’t care what anyone says.

If you are a dream,

let me keep sleeping.

I will take this dream

over reality any day.

Lord Shiva.

Ascetic Emperor.

You are my reality.

Unwavering and abiding.

My heart is intensely yours.

I do love you;

redundantly so.

I readily surrender my

life force into the care of your

strong supportive hands.

Lord Shiva,

You are the Greatest of Companionship’s.

-Parvati

Written by: Inanna Roxanna Arnett

© February 17, 2018

 

Pedophile Paradise

The organization of Jehovah’s Witness,

have very big problems.

Oh yes they do.

Don’t believe me?

Go watch

The Australian Royal Commission.

With little hope, they’ve been

put under the microscope.

The organization of Jehovah’s Witnesses,

have very big problems.

Oh yes they do.

Stirred with confusion,

ignorance, and fright.

With no where to hide.

They are embarrassed and

can no longer point their fingers first.

If only they took the time.

To look into the mirror.

Things would become

much, much clearer.

In their Kingdom Halls,

spots and blemishes.

Seep through their own walls of shame.

The organization of Jehovah’s Witnesses,

have very big problems.

Oh yes they certainly do.

Throughout the lands.

The wailing outcries of men, women, and

children are finally being heard.

Their spirits have been crushed,

afflicted, and humiliated.

The organization of Jehovah’s Witnesses,

have very big problems.

Oh yes they most assuredly do.

Don’t believe me??

Go watch

The Australian Royal Commission.

Sex crimes are the Witnesses

worst cover ups.

The Pedophile Paradise.

They tried to sweep under the rug,

is being cast into the air as “New Light”.

 

Now, Watchtower tell me no more lies.

Just who are the mentally diseased??

Certainly not the apostates.

For they are the ones speaking up

about your vial and disgusting practices.

Written by: Inanna Roxanna Arnett

© February 17, 2018